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Jonathan Almighty

Sep 11

If there is anyone who knows all about power — its uses and abuses — in Nigeria’s democracy (and perhaps, for most part of Africa), that man is Diepreye Alamieyeseigha, a former governor of Bayelsa State and ex-boss of President Goodluck Jonathan whose impeachment proved a magic bullet that paved the latter’s way to Aso Rock. Alamieyeseigha has been to hell and back because, among other factors, he miscalculated the extent of tyrannical power Aso Rock wields in a lopsided democracy. His reprieve has turned him into a self-hagiologist like a former...

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Youth Earnestly Ask for Goodluck Jonathan

Sep 04

In a repeat of Ibrahim Babangida and Sani Abacha’s failed civilian transfigurations, President Goodluck Jonathan is being endorsed by vainglorious organisations. The 1990s birthed the rent-a-crowd presidential endorsement movements. First, Arthur Nzeribe, Abimbola Davies and Jerry Okoro had sought an extension for Babangida’s military junta via the auspices of the Association for Better Nigeria; their activities contributed to what would later culminate into the June 12 crisis. Not to miss the military gravy train, after the “step aside” of the...

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The porn of Shekau and Shekarau

Aug 28

At first glance, Boko Haram’s “caliph”, Abubakar Shekau, and Nigeria’s Minister of Education, Mallam Ibrahim Shekarau, share nothing in common. They ought not to. The former is a theocratic death cult thug whose chief ruse is a censure of western education whilst the latter got his sea legs in education management. An objective appraisal, however, throws a kink: Both are annihilators; pornographers of violence. At one point or the other, both men have exhibited an authoritarian streak that bodes disaster for whomever and whatever that do not align with...

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Who is Marilyn Ogar working against?

Aug 21

By tomorrow, Friday, August 22, the kidnapped girls of Chibok would have been unwitting ”guests” of Boko Haram for 130 days. Between their kidnap and frightful escapes, the recurring line from the relevant security agencies has been, “We know where they are”! Ironically, every Nigerian knows where they are too: With Boko Haram! The Department of State Security, formerly known as the State Security Service is primarily charged with intelligence gathering within Nigeria. Perhaps, bereft of adequate intelligence and tactics to take on bigger opponents like...

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The Nigerian soldiers’ wives mutiny

Aug 14

November and December of 1929 saw thousands of women stampeding the Native Administration outposts in Calabar and Owerri to protest both the imposition of taxes on women and the appointment of warrant chiefs by the colonial administration. The protest, to be later described as the Aba Women’s War, saw employment of both guerrilla strategies and traditional acts such as “sitting on a man” – the practice of ridiculing men through song and dance performances carried out all night long. Some 20 years later, a similar policy of arbitrary taxation led to the...

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Something worse than Ebola is already here

Aug 07

Mass hysteria has gripped many countries of the world over the Ebola outbreak in West Africa. Like all episodes of recent epidemics – Severe Acute Respiratory Syndrome and Avian Flu (H5N1), this outbreak has seen governments and the World Health Organisation devoting resources to finding a cure. Meanwhile, African leaders luxuriate and gallivant round the world, seeking nothing of importance; yet, chewing the same old issues on the same weary gums. Was it Karma that led to the United States screening some of them for Ebola? Who knows! Before we deem the US...

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The Rise of Female Suicide Bombing

Jul 31

Given the missed chance at assassinating Maj. Gen. Muhammadu Buhari (retd.) two Wednesdays’ ago, a blitzkrieg of female suicidal bombings, starting Sunday this week, seems intent on compensating for the failure. Except for the Lagos incident where Boko Haram leader, Abubakar Shekau, claimed he used a female suicide bomber to set off the explosion, none has claimed responsibility for this emergent phenomenon; maybe, the coordinators are too timid to hoist their flag – yet. From Borno State where news of terrorists attacks has been regurgitated to the point of...

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On the ID card/registration of northerners

Jul 24

The public bill sent to the Kano State House of Assembly mandating the lawmakers to pass a law legitimising the registration of all southerners – domicilled or coming into the state – was a strident way of teaching southerners a lesson in arrogance. If Nigerians ever needed to learn that mutual tolerance and respect are attributes we all have to cultivate as a consequence of migration patterns across the country, this public bill is a syllabus. The move came after a not-so-subtle threat that maltreatment of northerners in southern Nigeria would endanger the...

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The fall of Nyako

Jul 17

One has to be either naive or a perpetual denier of the obvious to extricate the impeachment and subsequent removal of the Governor of Adamawa State, Admiral Murtala Nyako, from the contest of wills he engaged in with President Goodluck Jonathan. In fact, when his impeachment saga started, I wondered why it took that long in coming. When Nyako started that battle, I had expressed some surprise the Economic and Financial Crimes Commission was not after him yet for the ostensible sin of taking on the Presidency. It turned out that I was jumping ahead of myself...

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The Nigerian Army, Lagos state can learn from the Pope

Jul 10

Recently, Pope Francis met six victims of sexual abuse by Catholic clerics and asked for their forgiveness. He also told the church to “weep and make reparation” for the crimes committed by the men of the cloth and which over the years, has had devastating impact on the church and on the faith. Pope Francis’ action is not unprecedented and who knows, this would probably not be the last time a Pope will apologise for the sins of the men of God. As long as church institutions are manned by mortals, it is delusional to imagine acts of evil will give way for...

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